Monday, October 19, 2009
On The Pink Bandwagon
I went for a check up last month and while I was there the doctor told me that it was time for another routine mammogram.

"Why? It's only been two years since my baseline. I didn't think I had to go for at least three more years."

"You're getting to be that age when routine testing becomes important," she said. I told her to watch her language.

I called Friday (during the great Flu Hoedown of 2009) for the appointment and was told that there was an appointment the following day. Knowing how hard these appointments are to come by, I booked it.

Recovering from the flu is not exactly the best time to go for a mammogram. You really just want to be home in bed, instead of in a cold room with a stranger and large machine aka The Torture Chamber. In this room you are subject to visual and mechanical torture known as Modern Mammography.

First the technician had me remove my paper robe. There I was standing around in just a pair of jeans and clogs. Thank god they let me keep my shoes on. I'd have been embarrassed otherwise!

Then the technician did a visual examination which consisted of lifting them up, then down. Then she said "Perfect!"

Next she positioned me in The Vise. The Vise is an XRay machine, which squashes your boobie flatter than a pancake while you are simultaneously shoved against it. Throughout this, you must "Relax!" while the technician takes a picture of what was once a three dimensional body part.

The first picture was taking a long time and just when I thought I might faint, The Evil One announced she was going to log back in to the computer. "Gee, the computer isn't seeing your breast. Just stay right there." Like I could walk away?

Finally I was released from the machine's grip, then instantly put back in and still the computer did not "see" my breast. I was relieved. The machine was broken! Hooray! Time to get dressed and go home, I thought. But no, The Evil One got it up and running again so she could reposition (read: SHOVE) me back into the machine. Four more times.

For all my joking half-complaining about this screening (which isn't foolproof but it is a good first line of defense), it was so worth the minor discomfort for a little peace of mind. It took longer for me to fill out the paperwork than to actually get the mammogram (reboot and all). So to hop on the Breast Cancer Awareness month bandwagon, I'm here to tell you go get your mammogram done. It's easy to skip or forget your screenings, especially when appointments must be made far in advance but do what you have to do and get 'em done!


Blogger CatMar said...

Good advice Mer.

Blogger Andie said...

you got your mammies grammied!! WHOO HOO! YOU GO GIRL!

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