Friday, March 28, 2008
Pennsylvania: If you don't need a permit for it, it must be illegal
I'm all for states coming up with creative ways to generate income without raising taxes but this is ridiculous.

As I've mentioned before, we have a small parcel of land that we bought in a campground. And this is the year that we'd like to start using the parcel for more than just parking our car when dad's place next door gets crowded. So, we've been looking for and RV. There. I said it. An RV. A trailer.

So we've looked and looked and we may have found one that suits our needs. Place for the kids to sleep. Place for us to sleep. A place to cook. A place to wash. What more do you need in the summer when you're up in the country? Oh, yeah. We'll also build a fire ring for toasting marshmallows.

What I've been able to gather is that the great state of Pennsylvania is a paper maven's idea of HEAVEN. If you want to do anything other than breathe and blink, you will need a permit. I may be wrong, but your mere existence may require filling out paperwork by your mother and might be contingent on receiving permission to live by way of a permit.

Would you like to do some work on your property? Please fill out this paperwork and file for a permit. That'll be $5 please.

Want to get an RV moved to the land YOU OWN OUTRIGHT and PAY TAXES on? Please fill out this form in triplicate, draw a diagram of where you will put this unit, drive 2.5 hours to your property and stake out where you're going to put it, then give us $200 and VOILA! We will give you a permit! (As soon as a government employee find time away from filing the massive amounts of paperwork to go and double check that you have done all this, of course.) And no, you can't fill it out online because many townships have barely come to realize that there is something called "the internet" let alone have their services handled electronically.

Oh, but wait. The POA will need copies of the permit, and the hauler will need to file a permit in order to enter, as well as giving a copy of his liability insurance to the office. Don't forget to let the security hut know someone's coming because if you don't, they will be denied access and turned away! (OK, that last part makes sense.)

Now, say you'd like to have, oh I don't know, a boat so that you may take advantage of the wonderful lakes and rivers in the area. Please fill this out and give us $$$. Want to tool around the community in a golf cart? Please fill out this form and give us $$$.

Once you've paid for all the permits you need to you know, USE YOUR PROPERTY, you might need a drink. Or six. Well, good luck! Because you can't drive to the store and pick up a six pack. No siree! For a beer, you need to drive to a state-run distributor and purchase an entire case. Oh, and if you want a glass of wine? I hope there's a state-run liquor store in the area otherwise you are up the creek. And probably without a paddle because you needed a permit for it.

All this to spend a 2-3 weekends a month camping with your kids and creating memories.


2 Comments:

Blogger Andie said...

OMG! That is too funny....lol
don't laugh. you may need a permit!

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Mer, my love, you are just too funny. Keep me posted on what you are going to do, I don't it will be happening for us! All the paperwork and permits, we would need to stay up there for more than a year!! (which wouldn't be too bad)

love all around,
Mom

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