Wednesday, March 5, 2008
It is Wednesday and I'd Like for This Week to Stop Sucking, Thank You Very Much
As residents of New York City, we are forced to participate in an asinine ritual called Alternate Side of the Street Parking. Twice a week you can't park on one side of the street so that the city can come "sweep" the streets. They really just throw leaves and debris around and don't really pick anything up. But anyway, last night we needed to move the car. The car was parked on the sitter's block, which was convenient. I just picked up the kids and walked to the car. The only problem was it had a flat tire.

I loaded the kids into the car with all their gear and the stroller and the umbrellas because it was also raining, then went to the nearest gas station. Into the air pump I deposited 50 cents (a crime, if you ask me), and was met with silence. The air pump wasn't working.

By now, I was annoyed, wet and tired. I went to the attendant's window and asked if the pump was working. "Yes. Is silent pump."

I raised an eyebrow. "Silent?"

"Yes, ma'am. Silent."

"I DON'T THINK SO."

"Yes. Silent."

"Can I have my 50 cents back?" I asked. (On principle, of course.)

"NO."

"Your pump isn't working. I'd like my money back to go to the next station. I just need to fill it with enough air to make it to the Flat Fix."

"Is silent pump."

"SILENT MY ASS."

Guess what? The attendant walked me to my car, and told me to try again, which I did. Then I stood up and with my hands on my hips said "I think you'll agree THIS PUMP DOES NOT WORK."

He mumbled something then said "You no give it time. Here's your money back. Tire too flat."

I mumbled a "fuck you" under my breath and drove over the the Flat Fix. 15 minutes and $10 later, we were on the road home.

I read a little of Lilly's Plastic Purse to myself last night. Some of the wisest words ever written are in that book: "Today was hard. Tomorrow will be better."

It will be, right? Right!? Right!


4 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's funny you should mentions Lily's Plastic Purse but I always find that book incredibly reassuring too!

Blogger Andie said...

sorry to hear you are having a crappy day.

Blogger Unknown said...

Sorry about your terrible no good very bad day... borrowed from another children's book. I have Lily's Plastic Purse in my classroom. It's a really good book.

Blogger Ali B. said...

I've been there with the alternate-side-of-the-street (back in my NYC days; can't quite imagine doing the street shuffle now that I have kids, though. I think I would lose my cool). And more recently I've been there with air pumps. I recently had to drive from station to station, because no pumps worked. And it's supposed to be so easy, but it's not, and no one helps.

WAS tomorrow better?

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