blue monday for you. for us, not so much

today is supposed to be the most depressing day of the year, according to psychologists. for us, we celebrate the girl's entrance into the world:

six years ago today (well, yesterday, really), i was on light bedrest while i was waiting for my first child to be born. lazing on the couch early sunday morning, keeping my ballooning ankles aloft on a cushion, i was mortified, mortified, to discover that the worst had happened: i was incontinent. every time i got up, i felt a little trickle. about 12 hours later, i thought i should call the doctor. i wondered if it was normal to be like that?

if i call the doctor, i thought to myself, they'll make me go to the hospital. then i remembered the words of my wise childbirth instructor: eat before you go! they will not let you eat once you are in the hospital. they only give you ice chips which is soooo not chocolate or big macs. so, i did what any pregnant woman would do: i made a meatloaf with mashed potatoes. then i called the doctor.

sure enough dr. perlman said: "go to the hospital."

when we arrived, i told the nurses "i think my water may have broken."
"if you don't know for sure honey, then it probably didn't." wtf? was she doubting me, the wise, pregnant, but more likely incontinent, precious vessel that i was?
"well, my doctor said to have you check me." i said in my best what-the-heck-do-you-know voice.

so they checked me. the doctor on call said "no, your sac is still intact. i'll just double check with a litmus pa-hey look, your waters really did break!" then he said something terrifying: "hmmm? how is this possible?" now, when two conflicting things are happening in your body and the doctor is audibly befuddled, the second to last thing you want to hear is "hmmmm...how is this possible?" (the very last being "wow! that's bad." which i've heard twice in my lifetime already. but that is another post.) out came the sonogram machine and there it was: a tiny tear at the top of the sac.

20 minutes later, i was hooked up to a monitor. "do you know that you are having contractions every three minutes?" the nurse asked. i didn't know that, i was too busy wondering if my child would be born before the chinese new year. "do you think this'll be over before tuesday?" i asked. "why, do you have plans, dear?" the nurse asked. "no, it's just that if the baby is born before tuesday, it'll be born under a dragon year according to the chinese calendar, which is considered lucky and only comes along once every 25 years." all she could say was "it's sunday. of course you'll be done by tuesday." thank goodness, i thought! a lucky baby! this was gonna to be great! and we're not even chinese! we're irish so surely there's some sort of cross-cultural luck thing going on....

then came the iv. now, until this moment, i'd never been admitted into a hospital and i'd never had an iv. my nerves were on edge because of this. plus i'm a big fat whiny baby. throw in the fact that i can't stand the sight of my own blood and i was a mess (but only on the inside; on the outside i was a zen eve who was bring life forth into the world). so my nurse put the iv in. then i felt a warm trickle down my arm and my nurse said "whoa" and then i looked down and said "my knees are buckling" and then i nearly fainted. the iv wasn't delivering fluid; the blood was backing up into it and running down my hand all over the place. the floor looked like a crime scene.

one epidural later, i was able to catch some zzz's for a couple of hours before telling my husband "hey you! wake up. get the epidural guy. the drugs have worn off and i need more." but the guy with the drugs didn't come. it was the doctor to check me. "you're ready to push!" she said. she had just returned from a carribbean vacation so she was pretty jolly and laid back mon, but she didn't have the goods so i could have cared less.

two and a half hours later, my beautiful baby girl arrived. she was, and still is, pure perfection with her red hair and give-'em-hell crying. all 7lbs 4oz of her. she's been by my side ever since, usually dressed from head to toe in pink and carrying a doll in various states of disarray and/or undress. she has a killer sense of humor, is bossy (i don't know where she gets that from) and she's smart as a frickin' whip. happy, happy birthday to the best daughter anyone could ask for!