blue's clues the musical

our new fish, toast and carrot, now live on a low table in the living room so the little one can keep sticking his hand in the tank see them. that has freed up space on my daughter's dresser for things like a jewelry box, a lamp and a snow-globe picture frame we bought for her in disney world.

on friday, i uploaded pictures for the frame to the rite aid picture center thinking it would be a good quick project for the weekend except i never actually made it to the store to pick them up.

but on monday the subway was mercifully efficient and i decided to hop off the train a stop early to pick up the pictures before picking up the kids.

if the following encounter was a scene from "blue's clues: the musical", you as an audience would have seen many paw prints all over the stage. those would have been the clues that i failed to notice during this fruitless effort to retrieve my pictures but maybe you could have yelled out "a clue! a clue!" and at some point i could have gone to my thinking chair to figure out what the mystery was.

i patiently waited for the photo clerk at the counter. an older gentleman shuffled out of the office, clearly annoyed that someone would want to pick up pictures from the photo counter. ("a clue! a clue!") i explained what i was there for, gave him my name, etc.

the man placed the stack of cash he had carried out of the office on top of the register, which, had i been less honest i could have quickly reached for and taken. but since my thieving days are behind me and i am completely rehabilitated, i just watched as he searched the photo area for my envelope, puzzled as to where it could be. ("a clue! a clue!") it was not filed away in the proper box and he eventually found it ontop of a large piece of machinery.

there was nothing on the envelope other than my name and phone number so i just told him what was inside. four prints. that's it. four prints at $.19 a print. the man, who was also wearing a vest that had a tag bearing the name "beverly" pinned to it ("a clue! a clue!"), took my $.82 and i was on my way.

except when i looked in the envelope, there were no prints inside. just a photo cd which i hadn't asked for since our year-old pictures are already stored on a cd and it is a bitch to cut the cd's up to fit your frames.

so i walked back to the counter and explained my dilemma.

beverly made me aware that the photo center isn't really his department. ("a clue! a clue!")

"okay," i said. "but aren't there four prints laying around somewhere?"

"miss, this isn't my department. do you have a receipt from when you dropped them off?"

"i didn't drop them off. i uploaded them."

"what?" said beverly. ("a clue! a clue!")

"on the computer. i uploaded them. on friday. these prints should have been ready on saturday."

"i don't know what you mean." ("a clue! a clue!")

"can you please output four pictures from this cd for me? that's all i want."

"i don't know. this really isn't my department." ("a clue! a clue!")

"i know but can i leave this cd here and have prints made from it?"

"i don't know how to do that."

"is there paperwork i could fill out to order prints?"

"i don't know. this isn't really my department."

"is there someone here who does work in this department?" i tried really hard not to sound snotty.

"she left for the day." ("a clue! a clue!")

i didn't stick around to figure out blue's clues but i have a feeling it's this: no matter how many times a man called beverly tells you "this really isn't my department," you can't will him to gain knowledge of digital photography with relentless questions. next time i'll quit while i'm ahead.