i have become that mom

it has finally happened. i have become that mom. the mom i swore i'd never be. without even trying, i've arrived.

we take our kids to church. we (meaning the husband and i) like church. we feel it gives us a good footing for the upcoming week of torture working while parenting two children. it helps us stay sane. (or, get us as sane as we're going to be for the next seven days.) the kids on the other hand....

a few weeks ago, we were having problems with the boy at church. he just wouldn't stay in the pew. he was only happy running around doing the church olympics decathlon, which include events such as ring-around-the-baptismal-font, 50 meter sprints up the aisles and everyone's favorite event, escape! in this event, the child athlete escapes the clutches of his harried parent(s) to the safety of the altar. while the sermon is preached. and the candles are lit. and the microphone is on and every word and shrill scream sound is amplified to every person in the building.

this mayhem went on for two weeks straight. i was beginning to wonder why i was even bothering. our pastor very kindly told me that it is ok, this, too, shall pass. no one minds having our son run around and he is pleased harry feels so comfortable that he would approach the altar. it put my mind at ease but i still wish, for the love of all that is holy, that my son would just sit still.

yesterday, was better (he didn't run up onto the altar) but my daughter is the one that pushed me over the edge. our kids don't pay any mind to the service going on around them. i'm ok with that. but i asked my daughter a few times to keep it down while she played with her polly pockets in church. finally i asked her to put them away, it was time for communion. she told me "i'm not going up there." i told her she was, let's go, it's time. i held out my hand to her, sure she would hold it. she didn't. i pretended to shoo her away, thinking that reverse psychology would work in this instance. it didn't. that's when she stuck her tongue out at me. and that's when i became that mom. the chastising mom, the fed-up mom. the mom that took her daughter by the hand out into the lobby and reminded her that "the fourth commandment is to honor thy parents and you, missy, are way out of line!" i may have ended it with "now get your butt up to the communion railing!"

lord, help me.